Menu Upgraded for Huck Finn Day

According to a press release issued by the City, fisherkids that attend tomorrow’s Huck Finn Derby will be eating a little better than usual tomorrow night.¬† While the settling basins at the City Yards have traditionally been stocked with trout, this year they will be stocked with halibut!

According to the press release, when the Community Services Dept. contacted Fisher-Price King, the company from which they usually buy the trout, they were informed that due to an overstock, they could get halibut for the same price they would normally pay for trout. 

Because the trout in the basins generally average under two pounds, and the average halibut is about twenty-four pounds, City Staff felt this was too good an offer to pass up.¬† So, last evening, the Fisher-Price King truck pulled into the city yards and unloaded nearly 2,000 halibut into the basins.¬† “We usually get two thousand trout, so we just got the same order that we always do.”

Unfortunately, there were a couple hitches in the getalong.¬† The increased size of the halibut meant a major difference in the water displacement, and the basin soon filled to overflowing.¬† Fortunately, the water ran downhill to the other basin, which also nearly overflowed.¬† However, the water stopped rising about three inches from the top, so unless there’s a heavy rain, all should be okay.

Additionally, no one thought about the fact that halibut are salt water fish and trout are fresh water fish.¬† When this was pointed out to a City staffer, they contacted Fisher-Price King, who told them that it should be okay, it should take about four days for the halibut’s system to break down from the lack of salt in the water.¬† “As long as all the fish are caught over the weekend, we should be okay,” said the City employee.¬† No word on how the City will attempt to¬†mitigate the odor in the yards if some fish remain in the¬†basin after the weekend.¬† Asked what would happen if the¬†Fisher-Price King representative was mistaken, and the breakdown occurred¬†faster than expected, the employee said “Well, if the fish die, it will just make it that much easier to¬†catch them, right?¬† Just use your net, no need to cast that rod.¬† Should cut down on injuries, as every year, we have¬†a couple people injured by hooks as someone near them casts out into the water and misses.”

Parents planning to bring their kids to Huck Finn Derby are encouraged to make a couple adjustments this year.¬† According to the press release, it is recommended that everyone check the line on their rods, to make sure the line is capable of handling the heavier weight fish.¬† Another recommendation is that parents invite uncles, cousins, and other family members, as most of the kids are going to need help to pull fish of such a large size out of the water.¬† “Just another side benefit, increased quality time with the family,” said one City staffer.

One last thing regarding the change in fish type for Huck Finn Day.  APRIL FOOLS!

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